"And in that moment I swear we were infinite"

Your still there.
Your still in the background.
We're not waiting around anymore.
But I'm still here and you're still there.
I take comfort in that.

And Maybe I wont say anything.
But I know that I could.
And I take comfort in that.

Free

My breath runs free.
I act without thinking.
I think without acting.

Awake on the east coast.

I want to be back on the beach.
Under the stars. Under the sun.
Touching the ocean, pulling my heart out to sea.
Cold and unfeeling.
Shivering and alive.
I was far far away from everything that was hurting me.
And being so close to the sky and the water
took my tears away and left me with this beauty before my eyes.

Hope and dissapointment

We are not a family,
We simple live together and use eachother whenever we need something.
Our words fail to say what we mean.
And I just want to know the story, of the pictures and the records.
But all you say are the bitter empty places they lead to.
Tell me that greasy boy in the photo album taught you so much about yourself.
That people were missing in some pictures where they should have been,
but that things can change. We're all capable of changing.
Tell me you have faith.
And mean it.
It isnt about you anymore.
Its about growth and truth.

And I was there to listen to your story.
But it seems you dont even care enough to let me in.

Gone

Your screaming loud at me,
This house quivers underneath your rage.
These walls shake on the inside.
But my bones withstand all you say
Everything that should shatter me like glass.

I'm wishing for you to replay this in your head tonight
Before you fall asleep.
And be sorry.
That I'm not yours anymore.
Fear can't control those who are fearless.
And I walk away.

'this life is more than just a read through'

And you gave up on me.
But you dont see how I'm waking up every morning brand new.
And being weathered away by the day.
In the morning I'll be brand new.
Dont you worry.
You can just pretend that time isnt passing by us.
But maybe I wont be there when you wake up from this dream.
Maybe.

street lights

And I'll dance if I feel like it.
But that doesnt mean I'm happy,
I just wont give up.
I'm not going to hurt you on purpose.
Because life is complicated enough without going to bed and waking up angry.


So I'm just not sleeping.

Like a star

Laying under the stars, you say
is the best feeling in the world.
But not when you're alone.
Not when you're alone.

Because I dont need the stars to make me feel small.
I do that on my own.

Far away.
I love you like a star.
We can see them shine long after they burn out.
And I wanted to tell you how the clouds were on fire.
But you werent there.
Where have you been?

seventy/thirty

Because I am the one who loved more.
And I can remember all our conversations.
But cannot recall what you look like, or even the sound of your voice.
You're foreign to me. But my heart knows you like a secret.

Because

Because you make me feel invincible
and thats exactly what I think you are.
Because It would slowly kill me to lose you.
Because you deserve the best of me.

The last time

I've been gone for so long. I took a vacation in my own self pity.
My heart was asleep. A coma that I found my way out of.
My mistakes are wasted time. Gone.
We are not meant to be empty.
Love is learned.
Action.

I remember when you said I seemed unhappy.
As if It hurt you. I hurt you. I loved you.
You didnt ask me why. You told me the truth.
That was the last time.

Nobody here can live forever

The walls of my room are new and green and alive.
It reminds me of fourth of julys from a long time ago.
It hardly ever rained then.
I didnt appreciate the sun then.
Did anyone?

"Its 5 O'clock in the morning" she says. Like I've committed a crime by being awake.
In some places the sun would be coming up at this time.
But this house is crowded with trees. Covered in shade.
The sunrise would be burning pink in some places.
Places shes left behind for some new security.
Saftey under the shade. Painted so dark and thick.
And I sit here underneath it all. Heavy Sleepless.
Did it all get real enough?

Just old light.

My heart knew you like a secret.
Your name aloud would turn my stomach.
Now my heart remembers you like a twisted dream.
My head can hold composure and block the memories that flew butterflies in my body.
I can handle anything you dare to throw at me.
Your I love yous, your I'm sorrys. I read them and I'm done.
It's gone. We're over.
Its refreshing.

Watch me simplify it for you.

Anyone would go crazy like this. "Just tell me you're sorry"
Just say it. I cant take living like a show for everyone else.
Talking for attention. Losing control just to prove you could.
Your fake happiness with your dull worthless words.
Swallowed by enormous exaggerated laughs.
Your eyes are dark selfish plastic lies.
Lie to me.

Be true.
You want us to hurt as bad as you.
Deprive a child of real love respect life.
All the things you lack.
Where are you half the time?
Treat me with a lifetime of bitterness. Your scars.
What are you, a bully on the play ground?
Grow up.
Watch me simplify it for you.

Winning the argument is pointless.
Being nastier gives me no more respect for you than I had from the beginning.
Learn from me. Respect what I know.
I am not the new one.
Your arrogance is unwanted.
Where were you for her tears?
Invisible. Silent.
Angry. Regretful.
Pathetic.
You really think you saved us dont you?
Love saves. Not money.
Watch me simplify it for you.